Hand Tools

I was helping James take apart a lego vehicle he was building...

James (8): "Oh, you're using your fingernails as a crowbar?"

The "Stupid" Color

Me: "James, what's your favorite color?"
James (7): "Red."
Me: "Red or maroon?"
James: "Not maroon.  Isn't maroon what you call someone that's stupid?"
Me: "No, that's 'moron.'"

Cures for Backpain?

Jesse: "I was reading that men have back pain because we sit too much and don't utilize our back muscles like we ought to. It is suggested that we get 'standing desks' to help work our back muscles more."

Me: "Standing desks? Isn't that another name for a 'bar'?"

Homonyms Defined

James (7) is showing Ronnie (3) his Lego magazine, and reading a comic strip in it.  

...laughter...James: "No, Ronnie, not the nuts you are thinking of! Nuts like crazy in the head!"

Isaiah's Lunch

Jesse: "James, go sit on the couch, you're going to feed your brother."

James (with a laugh): "But I don't have any boobs."

Heavy Machinery

I was moving toys around the backyard after mowing...as I moved the basketball hoop...

Ronnie (3): "Mommy, are you a bulldozer?"

Best Workplaces in America

On our way out of my office, I grab my lunchbag...

James (7): "What's that?"
Me: "My lunch bag."
James: "Oh, that's nice that they let you have lunch around here."